Things to Do!

Alright. Here's a list of things to do instead of eat:

• Make bracelets
• Do schoolwork
• Study the Dewey Decimal System
• Write a letter
• Play Rock Band
• Play Assassin's Creed
• Play some other video game
• Listen to Pro-Ana music
• Play with my kittens
• Go for a walk
• Go for a cycling session
• Feed the kittens
• Drink water
• Tidy my bedroom
• Work over-time at the library
• Chew gum
• Read a book
• Organize my closet
• Talk with Alex
• Talk with Ana
• Talk with Ed
• Browse thinspirational quotes & pictures
• Take a nap
• Braid my mother's hair?
• Look at universities
• Plan out my next day minute by minute
• Plan my next outfit?
• Clean my shoes
• Do laundry
• Go window shopping
• Watch TV shows
• Take a shower
• Brush my teeth
• Make lists ;)
• Paint my nails
• Re-paint my nails
• Write a poem
• Write a short story
• Make a Wordle
• Browse the Interwebs
• Look at rage comics
• Make a rage comic
• Go to xkcd.com
• Draw a picture
• Paint a paiting
• Rearrange the furniture
• Fold all of my blankets
• Unfold them and put them back
• Fold them again
• Put them back again
• Think of all of the countries I've been to and try to remember every detail I can about each trip
• Go through a list of every Monk episode and try to remember, based solely on the title, what happens in each (I'm fairly good at this)
• Think of all the names I can and write them in a neat list - if the list isn't neat enough, start over
• Think of every person I know and their names, if they have or have had any pets, and imagine what animal they would be if they were an animal
• Sudoku puzzles
• Online games
• Logic games/puzzles
• Play tricks on people
• Go on Omegle and pretend to be somebody else
• Count things
• Make a list of things to count
• Study for my Spanish course
• Do odd jobs for cash
• Babysit?
• Write another poem
• Put away the DVDs piling in front of the television set
• Write another blog post
• Think of more things to do instead of eat 

I'll be continuously adding to this list as the days go by.

Guide me on, Ana.

Miss Madeline Fogg

Waist Shrinkage

My mother told me today that she noticed my waist shrinking. That is so exhilarating! But I don't want her noticing that. I guess it's inevitable though, I just have to work on really making them (my parents) believe that I haven't noticed. I blamed it on the fact that, "I'm still growing," hah. And I was wearing a different type of shirt than I normally do, so that could have been it. Besides, then I went on to binge SO MUCH FOOD, but I've promised myself that I will never-ever purge.


I feel so gross. :(


But I also went on a 21-kilometer bicycle ride, so that should have helped some. It's 16:30 right now, and I'm going to make up an excuse to get out of dinner because I've just eaten enough for me to last for about 3 weeks. Way to go, Flower.


Ana must be so disappointed in me. I'd bet the farm that she's angry as hell.


Man, I just want to be thin. That's all I want. If I'm thin, by problems will be gone. If I'm thin, he'll like me. That's what I'm going for. It's all for him.


Ana, I'm so, so, so sorry. Please forgive me. Please help me through this. Please help me create ways to distract myself. Please help me be strong! I need you now and forever, Ana. I'm dedicated to you, mind, heart, and soul. I'm willing and eager to follow you. I'll listen, I swear I will, but I just need you to talk to me. Do that, and I'll be eternally grateful.


I'll get thin or die trying.








Miss Madeline Fogg

The Beginning

So this is the beginning. 


Also das ist das Anfang.


This is the beginning of a new journey. A brand new journey with my brand new best friend, Ana. Ana and I have met on several occasions, but it was only just recently that we decided that we were such a perfect match. 


She's been telling me many things. Where we are, where we're going, how we're getting there, what I can do to aid the process, how wonderful the destination will be. She said that she'll always be here for me, and I trust her. Normally, I have difficulties trusting. But for some strange, extraordinarily peculiar reason, I find her completely and utterly trustworthy. So, I'd like to dedicate this blog to her.


Ana, I promise that I'll do what you want me to do. I know that you're who will help me get where I want to be, and I know that you won't leave me in the dust. I know that you'll discipline me appropriately and I promise that I'll strive day and night to be obedient to you. I want to thank you so much for being my friend thus far and I hope that we may always have this lovely relationship.


We've got an awfully long way to go, but I know that through listening to you, I can make it.


... Anybody care to join me? Shoot me a message.


I will make it.








Miss Madeline Fogg